


bf(f)

by Pepper_Moon



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Attempt at Humor, F/F, Falling In Love, Fluff, Humor, Ice Cream, Judo Flipping, M/M, Mean Girls, Mean Girls References, Modeling, No Angst, No Smut, No Volleyball, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Pancakes, Party, Piano, Sleepovers, Strawberries, Texting, Tsukkiyama centric, confident yamaguchi supremacy, its not a mean girls au tho, lmao im sorry, set in the us bc i have no knowlege of japan's school system, the american public school system (ew gross), well no volleyball but still HS, who tf put the balamic vinegar in the kool aid, yes like the movie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:26:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27127177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pepper_Moon/pseuds/Pepper_Moon
Summary: Yamaguchi is the stereotypical new kid at school. Unfortunately, he doesn’t know anyone except for Yachi, his next door neighbor. For better or for worse, however, the damn idiotic american public school system has decided that the best way to build better relationships between students is to pair them up,and to make a good ol' ‘BFF’ for the school year.Every day in homeroom, ‘BFF’s are given a topic to talk about with each other. On the very first day, Yamaguchi is paired up with Tsukishima, a guy who honestly looks like an angel, and a part of the most popular group in school (typical Mean Girls type shit) .With the help of Yachi, Noya, and Tanaka, (The Official Kiyoko Appreciation Association) Yamaguchi attempts to deal with his major crush on the guy. After all, it’s supposed to be a BFF, not a BF...right?Mean Girls (the movie), pancakes, gays, hand gestures (both good and bad), and 'BFF's. What could go wrong?
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Implied/Background of the following, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Shimizu Kiyoko/Yachi Hitoka, Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Comments: 60
Kudos: 96





	1. Angel

**Author's Note:**

>   
> Ty to kal, my AMAZING beta, ily, but pUHLEASEEE be faster to edit next time (short ass bitch)  
> A REMINDER/DISCLAIMER: THIS FIC IS SET IN THE US BC I HAVE LITTLE KNOWLEDGE OF JAPAN'S SCHOOL SYSTEM  
> ty for reading :)))

  
  
  
  
  
  


“Nervous?”

“A little.” Yamaguchi admitted. “It's more of a mix between excitement and nerves, if you get what I mean. How about you?” Yamaguchi asks, looking up at Yachi from the rock he was kicking around the sidewalk.

“Oh gosh I’m horrified.” Yachi says, her eyes widening. “Ack! Sorry! I shouldn't really be saying that. I’m not even the one that has to go to a new school.All the big, scary people from last year will be back.” She adds with a laugh, fiddling with her backpack straps. 

“So….. Are we going to do a Mean Girls type-thing or what?” Yamaguchi says, trying to change the topic.

“A Mean Girls thing?” Yachi says, looking over at him.

“Yeah! You know, like the map of the lunch room?” Yamaguchi attempts to explain, but Yachi still looks confused. “Have you ever even seen Mean Girls?” He asked, and Yachi shook her head. “Oh my god. You are coming to my house sometime so we can watch it.” Yamaguchi grins, hoping this would lift her spirits. She gave a small smile, and then looked back down at the sidewalk beneath her. 

Yamaguchi had moved into Yachi’s neighborhood two weeks ago. They were next-door neighbors, and bumped into each other while getting the mail. They talked for a while, and became fast friends. And now they were here, walking to school together. 

When they arrived at the school entrance, Yamaguchi said goodbye to Yachi, promising to find her at lunch, and walked through the front entrance. The truth was, Yamaguchi had lied to Yachi. He was also horrified, just didn't want to show it. It's not like you can blame him, he’s the new kid of the school and the only person he knows he only has one hour with, and it’s lunch. He racked his brain for where homeroom was, trying to remember. All the people talking and bustling around him didn't exactly help. He sighed and made his way to his locker, mumbling apologies to everyone he bumped into. 

He put his backpack in his locker, and checked his schedule for where his homeroom was. Ah, yes. Coach Ukai, room 2759. Yamaguchi grabbed a notebook and a pencil, which was all they were told to bring, and walked down to where room 2759 was, crossing his fingers that he wasn't late. He didn't want to get yelled at by any teacher, much less a gym teacher.

Yamaguchi got to where room 2759 was, but blocking the door was around 20 people. Yamaguchi tried to take a glance at who or what was blocking the door, and to his surprise, stood a man with dyed blonde hair pulled back with a headband. He looked in his late-20’s, so Yamaguchi naturally assumed he was Coach Ukai. He was saying something that Yamaguchi couldn't hear, and was waving his hands in a ‘quiet down’ gesture. Once everyone had settled down, Ukai gave a huff and leaned against the doorframe.

“Alright kiddos,” he said, sounding like he didn't want to do this. “I’m gonna be honest with you here, I don’t really want to do this.” There it was. He sighed, then continued. “Well, I’ll be your homeroom teacher this year, sadly. My name is Coach Ukai, I don’t care if you call me Coach, Mr. Ukai or Coach Ukai, whatever. Normally I wouldn't have to do this, but apparently, the school system wants the kids this year to ‘build character’ by making new friends and stuff. How this is going to work is all days except for today, in homeroom you’ll be with your partner and have something to talk about. The school system hopes you can have a new ‘bff’ by the end of the year, or whatever you kids call it these days. Before you ask, no, you will not get to pick your partners, and no, you cannot trade partners. Now that that’s over with, here are your partners for the year and where you’ll be sitting.”

Coach Ukai started reading off names, but Yamaguchi zoned out. Would this actually work? What if he was paired with someone who didn't like him? Or someone he didn't like? Yamaguchi tried to clear his thoughts and stay positive. Even if he and his partner wouldn't be ‘bff’s’, maybe they could at least be acquaintances. Who knows? Maybe they would be ‘bff’s’. Yamaguchi saw more and more people file into the classroom, some happy with their partners and some less than pleased. Eventually there were only a couple people left, Yamaguchi included.

“...and Yamaguchi Tadashi, back seats by the window.” Ukai said, which brought Yamaguchi back to his senses. Dammit. He didn't catch his partner’s name. He walked into the classroom, hoping to claim the seat next to the window before his partner did.Claiming the seat, he looked outside to a bunch of trees. Now, if he and his partner didn't get along, he had a nice view.

He heard his partner sit down by him a couple moments later. He turned to introduce himself, wanting to make a good first impression. “Hi! I’m Yamaguchi!” He said as cheerful as possible. Then he finally got a good look at his partner. He was an angel. He was a literal angel. No, not an angel, he was more of if an angel and that one elf guy from lord of the rings had a child. The point is, he was beautiful. Normally Yamaguchi would say something like handsome or hot, but he was  _ beautiful _ . That was the only way to put it. His blonde hair and pale skin made him look like he was glowing, the way that the sun came through the window. He’s tall and thin, the kind of person you know plays basketball or some other sport where you have to be tall. His eyes were pools of amber, framed well with glasses. Beautiful. No. Stop it Yamaguchi. You can’t have a gay panic  _ now _ . This guy is supposed to be your future ‘bff’ not your ‘bf’. Besides, he’s probably straight. 

“Tsukishima Kei.” Tsukishima supplied, only glancing at Yamaguchi. It was only then that Yamaguchi saw a bunch of girls scattered around the room glaring at him, seemingly jealous of his partner. 

The rest of homeroom was mostly normal to previous years, explaining what the school year is going to be like, the rules, ect... Although Yamaguchi’s less sensible side kept sneaking glances at the blonde next to him.  _ Platonic _ glances. Totally.

***  
  
  


Yamaguchi looked around the lunchroom for Yachi, but there were so many people it was hard to see. Suddenly, he felt a hand grab at his forearm. 

“Yamaguchi come on!” Yachi said, guiding them to a table, where two guys were already sitting. Yachi sat down and gestured for Yamaguchi to sit next to her, across the table from the two guys. Yamaguchi sat down reluctantly, wary of the two guys across from them that were staring him down. It was unsettling. 

“Um Yachi?” Yamaguchi whispered to Yachi after about two minutes of the staring. “When you said scary guys, were you referring to them?” Yamaguchi asks, wondering why Yachi wasn't bothered by the guys staring them down. Yachi looked up from her lunch and laughed. 

“Who, Noya and Tanaka?” She asked. 

“I think so? Maybe? The guys staring at me.”

“Oh, no. They’re my friends.” Yamaguchi was definitely surprised at this. The two guys seemed like opposites of Yachi, and they looked plenty intimidating. “Noya, sit down. We all know you aren't really that tall.” Yachi says, sounding like somebody's mother. Noya, the one with the orange streak, mumbled something about how he isn't that short before sitting down. Yamaguchi had to admit, he did look a lot less intimidating. “Tanaka, stop making that face.” Yachi scolded. It was like these two were her kids. 

“How exactly are you guys friends? You guys seem so different and I haven't even talked to them yet.”

“Funny story actually-” Yachi starts, a blush creeping up her face.

“It was Kiyoko. Everything is because of Kiyoko.” Noya interrupts, slamming his hand down on the table forcefully.

“Who, or, er, what is Kiyoko?” Yamaguchi asks, curious.

“The most beautiful girl in the school. No, in the world.” Tanaka supplies.

“And how exactly does this Kiyoko girl factor into how you guys became friends?” 

“Well you see-” Yachi starts,

“Okay so my MAN Tanaka here had finally gathered up the guts to confess to Kiyoko right?” Noya interrupted once again. “Because I already had the honor of being slapped by her, he got to confess.” 

“Wait- slapped? Are you oka-” Yamaguchi started.

“Getting touched and/ or getting slapped by our goddess Kiyoko automatically puts you above the ranks of the other members of the official Kiyoko appreciation association.” Tanaka says like he’s reciting something out of a book.

Noya nods,then continues. “So Tanaka was going to confess, but before he did, Kiyoko said this, and we quote:”

“Fuck off, i’m only into girls.” Tanaka and Noya said at the same time effortlessly. It was like they shared the few brain cells that they had.

“Logically,” Tanaka picks up, “If Kiyoko was only into girls, then we had to find a suitable girl for Kiyoko san. We stumbled upon dear Yachi here, and decided that she was the only girl in the school suitable for Kiyoko. As a bonus, she had a crush on Kiyoko already.”

Yamaguchi looked at Yachi for clarification, and she nodded her head, her face now pink. 

“You know, you guys didn't have to explain it that way. And my crush on Kiyoko isn't that obvious!” Yachi said defensively.

“In their defense, your face is bright red.” Yamaguchi says, trying to hide a smirk.

“Oh be quiet.” Yachi mumbles, returning to eating her food.

“Oi Oi, were you teasing Yachi?” Tanaka asks protectively.

“Or,” Noya replies with an evil smirk. “Maybe he has his eye on someone! Is it Kiyoko?” Noya demands.

“No, no, no it’s not like that! It’s not Kiyoko I swear!” Now it was Yamaguchi’s turn to blush.

“Oh. Okay then.” Noya says, and starts shoveling down his food.

“Hold on a second.” Yachi pauses. “That implies you  _ do  _ have someone you’re interested in.”

“For someone who’s never seen Mean Girls-” 

“NO WAY. SHE’S NEVER SEEN MEAN GIRLS?” Noya blurts.

Yamaguchi and Yachi both shake their heads.

“We are totally watching it sometime. Mean Girls is like, top tier.” Noya says, returning to his food.

“Off topic. So who’s the person you’re into Yamaguchi?” Tanaka says, propping his face on his hands and batting his eyelashes.

The tips of Yamaguchi’s ears went red. He could trust them, he already knew that. That wasn't the problem. What if Angel turned out to be some creep? Wait. Angel? That wasn't his name. What was his name? Dammit. He forgot. He would remember if he described him, he hoped. “Well, uh, don't judge me or anything. So you know how we have those partners in homeroom?” Nods came from everyone, including Yachi, who was now invested. “Well uh, he’s my partner.” Yamaguchi half-says half-mumbles, his blush rising. 

“Ohoho?” Tanaka says. “Well, what’s his name, is he hot, go on, go on.” He says, gesturing with his hand.

“Well uh..” Yamaguchi starts. What was his name? He had been calling him Angel/Elf all morning he forgot it. Sue-something? No, it was Tsukki something. “..I actually half forgot, I had been calling him Angel because of how he looked, but I think it was Tsukki- something?”

Yachi’s eyes widened, and Tanaka gave a low whistle.

“Your homeroom partner is Tsukishima?!” Yachi says, looking shocked.

“Oh yeah, that was his name. Blonde hair, glasses-”

“We know.” Noya says. “You like Mean Girls right?” Yamaguchi nodded. “Well think of Tsukishima as one of the plastics.”

“Wait, his personality is that bad? Shit.” Yamaguchi says, slightly scared. He did not want to be sitting next to a Regina George copycat every morning. 

“Well, no, not in that way. The plastics as in super popular. I don't think he’s evil, from what I’ve heard.” Noya says, pushing his empty tray away. Yamaguchi let out a sigh of relief.

“No, he isn't evil. He was in my math class two years ago. He just seemed bored, I guess. And uninterested.” Yachi says. Bored and uninterested was better than evil in Yamaguchi’s eyes.

“And it wouldn't work out.” Tanaka says. “There are three plastics, and five of them.”

“Who are ‘them’?” Yamaguchi asks.

“Tsukishima’s friend group. The popular people.” Tanaka says, pushing away his tray just like Noya did. How did they eat that fast?

“Who are they? What are they like?” Yamaguchi asks, now he was invested. This was like a real life Mean Girls, but with less-evil people, and guys instead of girls. 

“See that table in the middle of the cafeteria?” Noya says, pointing him towards a table that Yamaguchi had a surprisingly good view of. There were five people at the table, and they  _ radiated  _ popular energy. On the very left was a guy with bleached ends and black roots, and a red hoodie on. He seemed too focused on his switch that he paid no attention to the others. He was easaly the shortest one there, the rest of them were at least four inches taller. Next to him was Angel- er- Tsukisima, picking through a salad. To the right of Tsukishima was a boy with brown hair, who was laughing and smiling, giving off bubly, social energy, where the previous two had seemed very antisocial. The guy next to the bubbly boy had black, messy hair that Yamaguchi couldn't tell if it was styled or not. The emo-hair guy smirked, and that smirk could probably make girls collapse. On the very end was a guy with spiked up white and black hair that seemed to defy gravity, even more than emo-hair guy’s. He was overflowing with energy, and Yamaguchi could hear his laughing from across the cafeteria.

“Yeah, I see them. Bleached hair, Tsukishima, Bubbly Boy, Emo-hair, and Gravity Defying hair right?” 

Tanaka snorted, and Yachi suppressed a giggle.

“That’s them. Can you see why they’re popular?” Noya asks once he stops laughing. “Great names by the way.”

Yamaguchi glanced again, and sure, they were all relatively attractive in their own ways, (Tsukishima more than the rest, but he wasn't going to say that out loud.) but there was nothing that really stood out.

“Not really.” He shrugged.

“Well then, Yama-whatever your name was, let me and Tanaka be your Janice and Damien. That short guy on the end,-” 

“You can’t call other people short Noya, that’s being hypocritical.” Yachi interluded.

“Oh shut your face.” Noya shot back with a playful glare. “Anyway, the short guy on the end, that’s Kozume Kenma. Everyone calls him Kenma though. He has five million subscribers on YouTube for gaming.”

“Five Million!?” Yamaguchi says, ignoring the blueberries that dropped off of his spoon.

Tanaka nodded. “He’s really good too. Shows very little emotion so is a master at horor games.” he says solemnly. Yamaguchi couldn't tell if it was jealousy or respect. 

“Jesus..” Yamaguchi mumbled. 

“The next one, your precious angel Tsukisima,” Tanaka says, batting his eyelashes again and dramatically putting his hand over his heart. Yamaguchi decided to ignore the ‘your angel’ part. “Because he’s so hot, some girl in middle school came up with a theory that he’s a model and it stuck.” Tanaka shrugged. “Not as dramatic as five million subscribers, but that’s how popularity works, I guess.”

“Well, I guess, but think about it, if he really is a famous model, then it makes sense.” Yamaguchi definitely supported the theory, it made sense. Collective mumbles of agreement came from the others, then Noya spoke up again.

“Anyway, the next one, or ‘bubbly boy’,” Noya said, snickering. “Name’s Oikawa. He’s the captain of the drama club and theater department. He’s rich or something, or at least his parents are. A real show-off, and he gets all the girls. 87% sure he’s gay though.” 

“Noya!” Yachi scolded.

“Okay fine, yeah yeah ‘don’t make assumptions’ whatever. The guy next to him, the one with the messy black hair, that’s Kuroo. He’s a total playboy, holds the record of most girlfriends in a month.” Noya says, frowning. Yamaguchi had the feeling that Noya wasn't fond of Kuroo. Makes sense, Noya seems really loyal to the Kiyoko girl.

“Not something I'd be proud of.” Tanaka continues, in a better mood than Noya. “The guy on the end there, that’s Bokuto. Total athlete, star of the football team and shit. Has endless energy, but he’s not exactly the smartest over there.”

Noya brightened, and started talking about something dumb he and Tanaka did in middle school. While they went on, Yamaguchi was even more certain that this was going to be a good year.


	2. does he hate you? (or does he just hate everyone?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He fucks up....
> 
> ....or not?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to kal/yaku kinnie/god/my beta reader/ shortie/ wait these are all the same person bc ty for writing my fics, even if im annoying :))))

Yamaguchi stepped into homeroom, excited for whatever the american public school system had in mind for him and his soon-to-be ‘bff’ (the last f being very important). He wasn't the first one there, not by a long shot, but Tsukishima wasn't there yet. He did get the window seat again, which was nice.

Just like yesterday, Tsukishima came in right before the first bell had rang. Today he was wearing jeans and a dark purple sweatshirt that brought out the gold in his eyes and contrasted with his blonde hair beautifully. Yamaguchi meant that in a straight, no homo, basic, straight, ‘lets smoke weed after the football game and get all the girls’ type way, obviously. 

  
  
  
  
  


Obviously, that was a lie. 

  
  
  
  
  


“Okay twerps,” Ukai said, sounding as bored as yesterday, “Today is your first day of your ‘bff bonding’. Yay.” He said with unenthusiastic jazz hands, sitting up from the teacher’s desk and grabbing a whiteboard marker. “I should explain how this is going to go. I’m 60% sure I told you what this is all for yesterday, so we can skip that part. Anyway, here’s how it’s going to work.” he says, tossing the whiteboard marker in the air and catching it. “You’re going to come into homeroom, and there’s gonna be a prompt or a question to talk about with your partner for twenty minutes. Why do you need twenty minutes? I don’t know and I don’t care. If you finish before the homeroom is up, do homework or something. Again, no, you cannot switch partners, and please don’t get up from your seats to talk to your friends instead of your partner, the school system picked people you don’t know well for a reason.” He looked at a paper on his desk for what to say next. “The questions will get more personal as the year goes on, so the first questions will be basic.” He says, writing the prompt on the board. “Here you go.” He says, tossing the whiteboard marker into a small bucket and returning to his magazine. 

  
  


_ Cats or Dogs?  _

  
  


Wow. When he said basic he meant  _ basic _ basic. Yamaguchi quickly debated his options. He could answer first, but that might make him seem ego-centric. He could wait for Tsukishima to answer, but Tsukishima could be waiting for him to answer and that would be awkward. Neither were good options, so Yamaguchi decided to be polite and ask his partner first . “Which do you prefer?” He asks Tsukishima. The worst thing that could go wrong is it could just be an awkward and short conversation, but at least they would have a conversation.

Tsukishima looks up as he hums in thought.  _ Cute,  _ Yamaguchi thought _.  _ (If he was going to make it through the year he would have to up his straight-guy game.) “Cats, probably.” Nevermind, this man was  _ not  _ his soulmate, they were most definitely  _ not  _ meant to be. He was a dog-hating monster and that is very, very, very high on Yamaguchi’s ‘what not to look for in a guy’ list. Right above straight, but next to this being straight was a minor inconvenience.

“No way, why? Cats are lazy and boring and stuff.” There goes the nice and polite approach. At this rate he might as well be Gordan Ramsay with how easy he’s making friends.

“Cats are low-maintenance, you don’t have to walk them at five in the morning everyday.” Tsukishima says, seemingly unbothered by Yamaguchi’s statement. 

“Okay, first of all, you can walk a dog at any time, I think, and if you want something low maintenance, get a plant or something, pets need to be taken care of, that’s the point of them.” Yamaguchi says, trying to prove a point. If he was going to blurt out stuff that said ‘Hey I’m better than you and my opinion’s right’, might as well take it to the next level. 

“If I owned a plant it would die, at least cats can remind you to feed them.” Tsukishima deadpans. 

Yamaguchi opened his mouth to reply, but Tsukishima had a point. “Okay, okay, I’ll give you that. But cats are like the stereotypical introvert thing. Are you going to be a cat lady with twenty-some cats when you’re old Tsukishima?” Yamaguchi said, hoping this didn't look like a lame excuse to keep the conversation going. He may be a dog-hating monster, but he was hot, which was bad for Yamaguchi. How was he supposed to have a crush on someone who hates dogs, when getting a dog is the first thing he’s going to do after he moves out?  _ But he’s hot, a _ tiny voice in his brain said. Yamaguchi wished that the tiny voice would shut up.

“Okay, first of all,” Tsukishima starts, looking slightly annoyed, “if you hadn't noticed, I happen to be male. Second, if, under the very, very, small chance that I do get a cat, I'm only getting one.” He says, going back to his emotionless stare. Yamaguchi was a little worried that he pissed him off, but the worry was overtaken by confusion when he realized that what he said means Tsukishima doesn't even own a cat. 

“You defended cats that much, and you don’t even own a cat? Do you even like cats?” Yamaguchi asks, confused.

“I mean yeah, I like cats, but I also just really dislike dogs.” His attractive value went down about a million points there in Yamaguchi’s eyes.

“But why? Okay actually, don’t answer that yet. If you didn't have to do anything to take care of a dog, not a single thing, would you still keep it?”

“No.”

“But why? Dogs are cute, and fluffy, and snuggly, and sweet and cute, wait I already said that. They’re all affectionate and love you but cats don’t love you at all. I see the appeal of cats, but dogs are just.. better.” Yamaguchi says. 

Tsukishima rolls his eyes. “Dogs are annoying and clingy, cats can actually leave you alone. They bark all the time and it keeps you awake, and they jump on you and bite you,” he says with an annoyed expression, and Yamaguchi worried he’d dragged out the conversation too far.

“Wow. You must really hate dogs.” He says. At this point Tsukishima looked so annoyed that it didn’t matter if he was gay or straight, Yamaguchi had no chance. 

Tsukishima shrugs. “I guess. My neighbor when I was little had this tiny annoying dog that drove me crazy.”

“Not all dogs are like that!” No, stop it Yamaguchi, stop dragging it out he’s obviously annoyed. 

“Oh, sure. Do you have proof? I’m guessing you don’t have a dog either, so good luck backing that up.” Tsukishima says, a hint of a smirk on his lips. That goddamn bastard. He had no right to be that attractive.

But he was right, Yamaguchi did not have a dog, but he wanted one. “Okay, fine, you win. Cats are better blah blah blah. You’re probably just messing with me at this point.” Yamaguchi mumbles, giving up. 

“....Maybe I was, maybe I wasn't. You’ll never know.” Tsukishima says, a playful smile forming.

“Rude.” Yamaguchi says, play fully glaring, not meaning one second of it. Even if he was a dog-hating monster, Yamaguchi, sadly, wanted him to be  _ his  _ dog-hating monster. Noya was wrong, this is nothing like Mean Girls. In Mean Girls, Cady had a chance.

  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  


“No Yachi, I swear, he thinks I’m insane, or creepy, or dorky, or something else bad. You should’ve seen his expression, it looked like I was some six-year old kid he was babysitting and I’m throwing a tantrum. That’s how he looked at me. He totally hates me. The question was cats or dogs, and I asked him what he thought, and he said cats, and I argued with him, and now he probably thinks I'm annoying or just hates me. I messed up Yachi!” Yamaguchi rants, banging his head on the table, before Yachi placed her hand under his face so he couldn't do it again.

“Okay, stop banging your head on the table. You didn't mess up or anything, it's just…” Yachi says, lost for words.

“Just what.” Yamaguchi says, turning his head to look at Yachi, daring her with his eyes to say that he didn't mess up.

“Well, there wasn't anything  _ to _ mess up. The teacher didn't say you guys couldn't argue about it.” She says, trying to be helpful but just making it worse.

“No, no, that's not really it. The teacher said to answer the thing that was on the board, right?” Yachi nods. “And we didn't just answer it, we argued about it for half the time. And whenever we could’ve stopped talking, I just tried to keep up the conversation like some annoying creep!” Yamaguchi says, burying his face in his arms once again. 

“I’m sure he doesn't think you’re annoying, and if he does, he thinks everyone is annoying, if that helps.” 

“Yachi. I’m supposed to be his ‘bff’. We are going to be seeing each other every morning for the next year.”

“...Okay, I see your point. But maybe he just doesn't like the topic you guys had? All I know about him is he’s sarcastic and rolls his eyes a lot.” Yachi shrugs, looking at him with pity.

Yamaguchi groaned. Yachi was no help in this situation, Tsukishima probably hates him, and his gay ass is never getting another friend, much less a boyfriend. This isn’t some Mean Girls thing where he can be Cady and just pull a few strings, tell a few insults, spread a few rumors, and boom. Instant super-hot boyfriend. He actually has to work toward his goal and he has a bad case of side-character syndrome. At this point he would be satisfied with Tsukishima just tolerating him for the rest of the year. He was doomed. Very gay, but also doomed. 

  
  


Hopefully tomorrow goes better. 

  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“Okay, you can do this.” Yamaguchi said to himself as he shut his locker.  _ No you can’t, you messed it all up yesterday. Now the hottest guy in school hates you.  _ The little voice in his head was back, and annoying as ever. Yamaguchi shook it off and started walking to homeroom.

  
  
  


_ How does he do it? Yamaguchi _ thought. Tsukishima came at the exact same time again, looking flawless as usual. If he was any more perfect, Yamaguchi might die. Today, Yamaguchi would just agree with whatever he says, and then he (hopefully) wouldn't hate Yamaguchi. Simple.

  
  


_ Sweet or Salty, which is better? _

  
  
  


This was going to be easy. Tsukishima seemed like a ‘the more salt the better’ kind of guy, and Yamaguchi also happened to like salty things better, so this works out.

“I think we can agree on this one.” Tsukishima said from beside him. Yamaguchi was surprised, he thought he would have to start the conversation.

“I agree, say it on three?” Just get him to not hate you just get him to not hate you just get him to not hate you.

“Sure.”

“One, two, three!”

“Sweet.” “Salty!”

“Wait huh?” Yamaguchi said as he looked over at Tsukishima, who was frowning. “But… You’re so… I don’t know, salty? I figured you’d like salty things better!” Shit. That sounded really annoying.  _ Great job ‘agreeing with him’ Yamaguchi, now go take a swan dive off a cliff.  _ You know, the voices in his head are starting to make some pretty good points.

“Wow, thanks, I appreciate the thought,” Tsukishima said, rolling his eyes.”I thought you would choose sweets too, to be honest.” He said with a shrug. “I guess not though.” 

“I guess.” Yamaguchi said as he pulled out his homework. Yamaguchi bit his lip as he internally cursed out himself. You had one job Yamaguchi. To agree with him, and make him like you a  _ tiny  _ bit more. But no, you just had to fuck it up. 

  
  
***  
  
  


“Nice dinosaurs.”

  
  


Yamaguchi jumped, Tsukishima had scared him. Yamaguchi got bored after finishing his math homework and started doodling dinosaurs in his notebook, trying to pass the time.

“Oh uh these? Thanks.” Not blushing. Nope. Never. 

“You’re pretty good, do you draw a lot?” Tsukishima looked over his shoulder to look at the rest of the little doodles, close enough that Yamaguchi could feel the body heat radiating off of him. If he wasn't before, now he was definitely blushing.

“Sometimes. I like to paint a lot more than I like to draw though.” Play it cool, play it cool.

“I’m not joking, you should join the art club or something. ” Tsukishima said, going back to his book. Yamaguchi could die of embarrassment, and let out a sigh of relief when the bell rang to go.

“They were just doodles and they aren't really that good anyway and i’m sorry for annoying you!” Yamaguchi said, scurrying to pack up his stuff and leave before he got more embarrassed. However, with all the scurrying he was doing, he tripped over his shoelaces and scattered his things all over the floor. 

And then, something amazing happened.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


He laughed.

  
  


Tsukishima  _ laughed _ . 

  
  


And Yamaguchi melted inside. 

  
  


It was one laugh, but it was pure. It wasn't making fun of Yamaguchi, it wasn't fake, it was just a laugh. A beautiful laugh.

Yamaguchi stared at Tsukishima, wondering if he should walk away or stay.

  
  


“Oh my god that was so funny.” Tsukishima said, looking at Yamaguchi then reaching out a hand to help him up. Yamaguchi grabbed the hand and stood up, still blushing, mumbling something about how it wasn't that funny. Tsukishima helped Yamaguchi collect his stuff once again, and Yamaguchi just might die of embarrassment.

“Geez, keep the klutz act up and I might have to end our friendship Yamaguchi,” He said, still snickering, and walked out the door.

  
  
  


‘End our friendship’

  
  
  
  


Tsukishima didn't hate him after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the dog vs cat scene was a pain in the ass to write  
> i still did it tho  
> yell at me abt my bad writing on tumblr: mereibitch  
> Next Chapter: pancakes, sleepovers, and a dino shirt >:))


	3. i aint watchin horror movies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So I can text you, and force you to watch all of these masterpieces.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i would say im sorry for posting this a week late... but im not sorry at all  
> a GIGANTIC THANK YOU to four people:  
> 1) kal, the short ass bitch that i call my beta reader  
> 2) [bean](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Justagaybean) , [lessons from moths](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LessonsFromMoths/pseuds/LessonsFromMoths) , and [midnightswordsdance](https://archiveofourown.org/users/midnightswordsdance/pseuds/midnightswordsdance) , i love each and every one of your fics, and you guys never fail to motivate me and make my day :))))  
> a lil bit of a heads up: there are qUite a few tiny timeskips in here

It had been 19 (school) days since the day Tsukiahima had called them friends (and 19 days since the day Yamaguchi had horribly embarrassed himself in front of Tsukishima, but he would rather forget that). He had learned a couple seemingly irrelevant facts about Tsukishima, like his favorite color (green), his favorite food (strawberry shortcake), his favorite band (Tally Hall), and his favorite season (autumn). In those two weeks, the morning conversations had turned from awkward to friendly, teasing each other most times. It was fantastic. 

Yamaguchi sat down in his usual seat by the window and fidgeted with his pencil while he waited for Tsukishima to show up. He thought more about what Tsukihima had said that day. Was it a joke? Probably. But for Yamaguchi, it was reassurance that Tsukishima didn’t completely hate him, and that was enough. Would they ever be best friends? It’s….. a possibility. But there’s no way he’s getting over the level of friendship of people like Kuroo or Bokuto, who have known him for years, from what he heard. Boyfriends? No way in hell. Yamaguchi was just going to die pining, and he was fine with that. Well, not really, but that’s how things are when you’re crushing on a straight guy. 

“Good morning. Happy Friday.” Tsukishima says with a sigh.

“Why happy Friday to you too, Mr. Grumpy Pants. Have any plans for the weekend?”

Tsukishima apparently decided to ignore the comment, and dived straight into the question. “So… Have you written down your movies?”

“Hmm?” Yamaguchi hummed. “Oh, no, I didn't notice the prompt was up yet.”

_Write down your top 10 movies of all time._

  
  


Top ten of all time? That- No. That’s impossible. Yamaguchi’s watched so many movies that he’s loved, he can't pick just _ten_ _._ Only one was guaranteed, he had seen Mean Girls so many times that he couldn't keep track.

_mean girls_

  
  


The next two were also pretty obvious, but he wasn't sure which should go first. The Princess Bride was a movie he had been watching ever since he was a kid, but on the other hand, Titanic was iconic. God, this was hard. Yamaguchi looked over at Tsukishima, and even if he couldn't see what he wrote, Yamaguchi could see he had most of his down. Shit. Yamaguchi quickly wrote down the movies that he remembered he could confidently rate at least a 9/10, they didn't have to be in order, right? 

“Done.” Yamaguchi said.

“Well I’m not, so you go first.”

_top 10 movies (out of order)_

_mean girls_

_titanic_

_the princess bride_

_the notebook_

_the devil wears prada_

_dirty dancing_

_casablanca_

_her_

_the prince and me_

_literally any hallmark movie_

  
  


“Wow. These are….. Definitely not what I expected. I’ve seen most of them, so no judgement.” Tsukishima shrugged. “However, some Hallmark movies are trash.”

Yamaguchi buffered. “Well what does your list look like, Mr. Uncultured?”

“What is with you and the ‘Mr.’s.” Tsukishima grumbled, pushing over his notebook.

_1) The Nightmare Before Christmas_

_2) Beetlejuice_

_3)Heathers_

_4) The Social Network_

_5) Coraline_

_6) Carrie_

_7) Lord of the Rings_

_8) The Princess Bride_

_9) Jurassic Park (Not Jurassic world)_

_10) Star Wars_

  
  


“Wow I- Uh- Besides The Princess Bride I haven't seen any of these. I mean I’ve heard of Heathers from the musical but other than that….”

“You’re kidding.”

“No, I’m not.”

“You’re _kidding._ ”

“No, I’m not.”

“Not even Star Wars?”

Yamaguchi shook his head.

“Okay, give me your phone.”

“Huh? Why?”

“So I can hack Amazon, order a rubber duck illegally, and blame it on you.” Tsukshima said, rolling his eyes. “No, you idiot, I’m putting my number in your phone.”

Yamaguchi fumbled to get his phone out of his backpack, confused. “I- Uh- Here. But…. why?”

“So I can text you, and force you to watch all of these masterpieces.” Tsukishima briefly gestures to his list.

“I really appreciate it, but I’m not really one for horror movies. Sorry.” Yamaguchi says sheepishly. To put it simply, this was definitely not how he expected to get Tsukishima’s number. How he expected it was him being added into a groupchat or something lame. How he wanted it was it being written at the bottom of a heartfelt love letter, and that was never going to happen, so he’ll take what he can get. 

“These aren't necessarily horror movies. Sure, Carrie could be, Heathers is rated R, and Lord of The Rings and The Social Network aren't exactly for children either, but other than that most of these are made for kids. Besides, some of these are Halloween classics in my opinion, and it’s almost October. The perfect time to watch them.”

Yamaguchi couldn’t argue, he was pretty convincing. “Fine, I’ll watch them.” It’s not like he had any plans anyway.

“Okay, good. I’ll text you my address later, you can come over sometime.”

Wait what.

  
  
***  
  
  
  


Yamaguchi was confused. Confused was the only way to put it. Why would a super hot guy give him his number and then invite him to his house(?) just to watch some movies? It didn’t make sense in the first place as to why Tsukishima would give Yamaguchi his number, but inviting him over to watch a movie or two? That was just unrealistic. It was just some joke, and he just wanted his number. But then again, why would Tsukishima want Yamaguchi’s number in the first place? Nothing made sense when it came to him. Yamaguchi turned over on his back looking up at his phone on his bed. No messages, nothing. This was all just some sick joke from the universe to tell Yamaguchi that Tsukishima was way out of his league. Just to make sure he still had Tsukishima’s number, if in the low chance Tsukishima did text him, he opened his contacts and checked. Tsuksishima had saved his number in Yamaguchi’s phone as ‘Tsukishima/BFF’. Yamaguchi stared down at his phone and smiled.

  
  
  


About an hour later, Yamaguchi had gotten bored of checking his phone every minute, and slid on his socks into the kitchen, where his mom was making dinner. “What’s up Yamaguchi? You look annoyed.” His Mom says, dicing the tomatoes for dinner. 

“It’s nothing.” He lies, and sits at the counter, fiddling with his fingers.

“Tell the truth, what’s wrong?” His mom says, taking a pause on the tomatoes and looking at him with her head in her hands.

Yamaguchi sighed. “So… I may or may not like this guy…”

Yamauchi’s mom squealed. “Ooooh!!!! What’s he like, is he nice, is he cute?”

“Okay umm.. He’s snarky and sarcastic, no, not really, I swear to god he’s an angel in disguise. But that’s not the point. Remember the guy I told you about, the one I’m partnered with for homeroom?” Yamaguchi’s mom nodded. “That’s him. So our prompt for the day was to write down our favorite movies, and when he showed me his I hadn’t seen any of his so he gave me his number for some reason and then said he’ll text me his address so we can watch them together or something? It’s just…. It seems so unrealistic. There’s no way he actually wants to invite me over and watch Heathers or something.”

“I agree.”

“Wait huh? You do?”

“Yes, it’s super unrealistic. It’s obvious he likes you, that’s the only realistic answer.”

Yamaguchi quickly turned as red as the tomatoes his mom was dicing. “What? No. No way. He’s so far out of my league, you wouldn’t even know. He’s popular, and perfect, and a model apparently, and-”

“Shhh…. Stop thinking negative thoughts. Who cares if he’s out of your league? I got your ma, and she was way out of my league.” His mom says, shrugging. “And besides, it’s only five. He may not have had the time to text you yet.”

“Yeah right.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes until Yamaguchi’s phone buzzed.

“Bet you that’s him right now〜.” Yamaguchi’s mom says, putting the pasta in the boiling water.

“Oh shut up, it’s probably Yachi ag-”

**Tsukishima/BFF**

  
  


Hey sorry I didn’t text you before now, homework’s a bitch.  
Anyway, are you free tonight?

  
  
  
  
  


“No fucking way..” Yamaguchi mumbled.

“I assume I was right then.” Yamaguchi’s mom said, smirking.

“Oh sush your face.”

  
  


**Tsukishima/BFF**

  
  


Hey sorry I didn’t text you before now, homework’s a bitch.  
Anyway, are you free tonight?

_Yeah, why?_

Why do you think

I’m inviting you over and we’re watching the movies, idiot

_Oh shit really_

_I thought you were joking_

I never joke about halloween movies.

So would you be available?

You can sleep over if you want.

_Yeah, thatd be good_

_Whats your address?_

XXXXX xxxx xx

_Vdybhsuggshbajwsh you live like a block away from me_

_I can just walk there_

How convenient.

How many would you be willing to watch?

Or if you have any preferences?

_Idc_

_NO CARRIE THO_

_I aint watchin horror movies_

Okay, how about Heathers, Beetlejuice, Coraline, and the Nightmare Before Christmas?

And then Princess Bride to finish it off because we both like it

_Deal :))))_

_What time should i be over?_

Like 7:30 or so?

If that works

_Fine with me :))))_

_See u then >:)))) _

  
  


“Okay, looks like I’m going over to his house at 7:30 and sleeping over. That was…. Unexpected.”

“See, I was right,” Yamaguchi’s mom said.

“What? No you were not.” 

Yamaguchi’s mom said nothing, merely smiled and went back to dinner.

Yamaguchi rolled his eyes and pulled up Yachi’s contact.

**Yachi <3 <3 <3**

_Yachi_

_Yachi_

_Yachi_

_Yachi_

_Yachi_

What happened? Are you okay?

_Vfeydbjlkygedhbsjhw definitely not_

_Remember when i told you tsukishima gave me his number_

_To like watch movies or something_

_Well he actually invited me over to his house vbhdjkfjgdsx_

Thats great!!!!

Kind of surprised tbh, but good 4 u!!!!

_Tyty_

_Oh fuck_

?

_Yachi_

_Im going over to his house_

_TSUKISHIMAS HOUSE_

_AND HE INVITED ME EUVNJX <YDHEB _

Your just realizing this now??

_Vghxjiuiucdsxugyshx yachi what do i do_

_Im SLEEPING OVER YACHi_

_Im 17 and im having a fucking sleepover_

_With TSUKISHIMA_

_Tvgdsjdvyghjsyugsh_

_H e l p_

Ummmm

Idk how

Sorry ://///

_Okay let me put u in my situation_

_Out of the blue_

_Kiyoko invites you over to her place_

_What do you do_

Cgvutfgxhsuidjsx I WOULD PANIC

Ohhh

I see

Okay ummm

Its a sleepover right?

So uh

Wear something you could sleep in, but also counts as clothes

From what it looks like 

I think you guys r gonna watch a lot of movies

And umm

Idk 

_Fvdcbhjkjhsxn okay_

_Any other advice_

Nope

Have fun :)))))

  
  
***  
  
  
  
  


Yamaguchi was definitely not going to have fun. He stood at Tsukishima’s doorstep, double checking that he got the address right. He rang the doorbell, stepping back to be polite. Tsukishima opened the door, dressed full-out in a white t-shirt and dinosaur pajama pants. _Cute._ Nope. Shut the hell up brain. You can gay panic all you want at school, but this is his _house._ Calm down. “Come on in.” Tsukishima says, opening the door for Yamaguchi to come through.

Yamaguchi mumbled a thanks, and then followed Tsukishima to what he assumed was the living room. “Wow, that’s a lot of snacks.” Yamaguchi said, and he was right. There were bowls of M&M’s and popcorn next to a couch facing the t.v. 

Tsukishima shrugged, “yeah, I mean we are watching five movies, so…” Tsukishima sat down on the couch, cross-legged, and Yamaguchi took the couch section next to him. Yamaguchi was painfully aware of the mere five inches between them.

“Are your parents home?”

“My mom is, but she took the night shift yesterday so she’s asleep. Anyway, the order is Nightmare Before Christmas, Coraline, Beetlejuice, Heathers, then Princess Bride. You okay with that?” Yamaguchi nodded, unsure what to do. “Sweet. Okay then,” Tsukishima pulled a blanket over him, “Prepare to watch the greatest movies you will ever see.” Tsukishima looked so excited, Yamaguchi couldn’t help but smile. 

***

“Wait, so do they not know other holidays exist? And they just prepare for Halloween year-round? That sounds boring, wouldn’t they get sick of it?”

“Well how I see it is they do it for Jack, because he seems to like Halloween so much, and they look up to him as the pumpkin king.”

“Ohhhh that makes sense.”

  
  


***

“Oh come _on_! Why can’t Jack just fucking listen to Sally?”

“Well, Jack’s like, admired and stuff in the town, so even if Sally convinced him, would he let down all the people?.” Tsukishima explained.

“Okay, okay, I see your point.” Yamaguchi said. It had become about a million times less awkward once they had started the movie, with both of them giving commentary and playfully bickering. It was….nice.

  
  


***

“Fuck, that’s creepy.” The Other Mother had come on screen with the button eyes, and Yamaguchi found it less than plesant.

“Oh just you wait.” Taukishima, said, smiling deviously.

***

“THIS MOVIE IS FOR KIDS?”

“Yep.”

“I- Bu- THEY WANT HER TO SEW FUCKING BUTTONS INTO HER EYES! HOW IS THIS FOR CHILDREN?”

Tsukishima laughed, and from the dim light of the t.v., Yamaguchi could see a faint smile on his face.

***

“THE FUCK?!? DID SHE JUST SHAPESHIFT OR SOMETHING?”

“No, that’s her real appearance, she shapeshifted into Coraline’s mom.”

“I still don’t see how this is rated PG.”

“You could just be a scaredy cat.” Tsukishima shrugged with a smirk.

“Shush your face.” Yamaguchi gave a soft punch to Taukishima’s arm.

***

“AAA FUCK!” Yamaguchi jumped at the small jumpscare.

“Awww want me to make it better?” Tsukishima said with a fake pout. 

“Shush your face.” Yamaguchi hoped Tsukishima didn’t see his blush.

***

“Wait, so they’re dead?”

“Mhm.”

“But then why are they still in the like, living world? Shouldn’t they be in the afterlife?”

“Shhh that’s explained later.”

  
  


***

“NO LYDIA DON- FUCK!”

Tsukishima laughed. “Seems like you like the movie then.”

“Okay I get that Adam and Barbara are dying again and shit, but BEETLEJUICE WAS A LAST RESORT?! COULDN’T SHE MAKE THE SPELL STOP OR SOMETHING?!?”

“I’ve actually never thought about that. Maybe she felt like she had no other option?”

***

“Okay, why is the yellow Heather there? She seems too nice for the other two.”

“Peer pressure?”

“Makes sense.”

  
  


***

“AHAHAHA I CALLED IT!!! I KNEW THOSE WERN’T FAKE BULLETS!” Yamaguchi jumped up with his outburst, spilling some popcorn.

“Okay, okay, yeah.” Tsukishima smiled.

  
  


***

“When are they killing Heather McMa-whatever? Or does she get to live? She’s my favorite.”

“Okay, she does live, but you have questionable taste in favorite characters if you’re only worrying about her. Veronica’s obviously the most badass.”

“Is not.”

“Is too. She murders three people and gets away with it an-”

“Now you’re just contradicting yourself, that’s definitely questionable taste.”

“And that’s an opinion.” Tsukishima smirks.

***

“Okay, that was a good one. Princess bride time?”

“Absolutely.” 

It was around three in the morning, but they were still going strong. Sure, Yamaguchi liked the movies, but his favorite part was watching Tsukishima watch the movies. All the times he would whisper a line, say a ‘this is my favorite part’ or hum along with the soundtrack, those were precious. Cute, and precious.

  
  


***

They renacted the entire sword fighting scene. Yamaguchi took what he said earlier back, he definitely had fun.

***

Yamaguchi woke up with a yawn. He was a naturally early riser, so it was no surprise to him when Tsukishima was still asleep. He searched around for his phone, careful to not go near the couch that Tsukishima was sleeping on. He picked up his phone, and was surprised when it unlocked right away. He looked at the phonecase and it hit him. This wasn’t his phone, it was Tsukishima’s. He looked at the phone, the first thing that had popped up was a group chat between tsukishima and some other people (his friends?).

  
  


**The spice girls <3**

**Drama queen**

XECFGHBVBH GUYS IM FREAKING OUT WHERE IS HE

**Pain in the ass**

Did you check the windowsill?

**Drama queen**

YES I CHECKED EVERYWHERE

JUST HELP ME FIND MY FUCKING CAT

**Dumbass**

DO YOU NEED US TO COME OBER?!?!?!

ONER

OVER

**Kenma**

I’d rather not

**Pain in the ass**

Shut up kenma

Oikawa

If you want us to come over we will

**Drama queen**

YES PLEASE

_You know, i would, but I just remembered_

_I don’t give a single fuck_

**Dumbass**

Vdcbhj8duyhs meanie

  
  
  


Yamaguchi didn’t read anymore, it felt like he was invading Tsukishima’s privacy. Better to just wait until Tsukishima woke up.

  
  
  
  
  


***

Two fucking hours. It had been two hours since Yamaguchi had woken up and Tsukishima still wasn’t awake. It was 11 o-clock, how long could he sleep?

Yamaguchi decided to opt for last resort, texting the friends(?).

  
  
  


**The spice girls**

_Hello :)))_

_Are you guys Tsukishimas friends?_

**Pain in the ass**

who’s asking? ;)

_Oop_

_Hi, i’m Yamaguchi, i’m Tsukishima’s homeroom partner :)))_

**Drama Queen**

Hello!

If you don’t mind me asking, why do you have Tsukishima’s phone?

_Oh uh_

_I slept over at his house to watch movies and hes still asleep_

**Pain in the ass**

Ohoho slept over? ;)

_Shush your face_

_Its not like that_

**Dumbass**

Suuurrreeee ;)

**Drama Queen**

Ignore them, did you need something?

_Oh yes actually_

_Ive been up for two ish hours now_

_And tsukishimas still asleep_

_How do i wake him up??_

**Dumbass**

WHATEVER YOU DO DO NOT WAKE HIM UP

**Pain in the ass**

DO NOT

HES LIKE A DEMON IF HE DOESNT GET SLLEP

OE SOMEONE WAKES HIM UP

**Dumbass**

NO JOKE

I WOKE HIM UP ONCE WHEN WE WERE LIKE SEVEN 

AND HE PUNCHED ME IN THE FACE THEN FELL BACK ASLEEP

**Drama Queen**

Aagain, ignore them

Just do it gently

_Thanks! :))))_

  
  


Okay. Wake him up gently and be out of punching range. Got it.

Yamaguchi walked over to Tsukishima, he was at the point where he knew Tsukishima wasn’t going to be woken up by his footsteps. He kneeled down awkwardly, unsure of what to do and well aware of how close Tsukishima was, and waking him up would mean touching him. All he had to do was erase all gay thoughts. 

They gay thoughts refused to go away. 

He might as well get it over with. He gently placed his hands on Tsukishima’s back, gently shaking him and whisper-yelling his name. “Tsukishima, Tsukishima. Tsuki-? ADGH-”

It had happened before he realized it. Tsukishima had grabbed onto his ankle firmly and brought it up with a surprising amount of force and speed, causing Yamaguchi to fall on his back. “What the fuck Tsukishima?”

Tsukishima sat up, opening his eyes slowly. “Oh, sorry Yamaguchi. Thought you were my brother. Glasses please.” 

Yamaguchi placed Tsukishima’s glasses in his hand. “Why would you do that to your brother? Wait- You have a brother?”

“Hmm?” Tsukishima hummed, standing up. “Oh yeah, he’s in college. He comes for holidays and birt- shit.”

“What?”

“Ah, I’m sorry. I completely forgot, he’s coming this weekend for my birthday, so he might arrive while you’re here, sorry.”

‘No, no, it’s fine, i’m more confused by the fact that you did’nt tell me it was your fucking birthday!”

“Actually, it’s tomorrow, so don’t bother with buying me a gift or anything. Want to make pancakes?”

“Sure! I am giving you a gift on Monday though.”

Tsukishima groaned. “Fine, whatever.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Yamaguchi had no idea how Tsukshima managed to put that much whipped cream on a pancake. “Are you do-”

“No.”

“Keiii~ I’m home! Wha- oh. And who would you happen to be, stranger in my kitchen eating pancakes with my little brother?” Tsukishima’s brother walked into the kitchen. He looked nothing like him, with slightly darker hair and softer features.

“Hello! I’m Yamaguchi, Tsukishima’s friend from school.”

“Ohoho, a friend from school huh? He must have forgotten I was coming, he never brings friends over when I’m here because once he brought his friends over, and I told them all these embarrassing stories about him, like this one time when he was three h-”

“Aki. Stop.” Tasukishima said, and his brother laughed. His brother continued telling stories, Yamaguchi laughed, and Tsukishima grumbled. His brother was just another piece in the puzzle that was Tsukishima Kei. And Yamaguchi was determined to finish it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :))))  
> if you want to yell at me, my tumblr is here: [mereibitch](https://mereibitch.tumblr.com/)  
> ty for reading, comments are cherished more than your dead grandma cherishes her cookies


	4. bitchymiya and the shits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jobs, annoying friends, and bitches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan loona  
> im back bitches  
> ty to my beta reader kal, if you see any mistakes blame him, not me  
> and i big fuck you to bean, i wanted to read singing in the rain sooner bitch  
> the clair de lune is for grace and jo, i still love you guys

Yamaguchi’s brain was overloaded. Yesterday was Tsukishima’s birthday, so Yamaguchi had made a fresh batch of chocolate chip cookies, and he had a bag of a couple of them as a birthday gift in his bag. He had stayed up all night to complete the homework he had procrastinated doing, he slept through his alarm, he was seconds away from missing Yachi on her walk to school, he had a killer headache,couldn’t seem to find the aspirin, and on top of all of that, Yachi had begged him to join the art club because quote unquote ‘Kiyoko’sthepresidentthisyearandIforgotandIdontwanttohaveherbetheonlypersonIknowpleasepleaseprettypleaseYamaguchipleasejoin?’, and Yamaguchi was insane (and tired) enough to say yes. 

“You look like shit.” 

Yamaguchi turned to Tsukishima, or more specifically the deep bags under his eyes. “I don’t know if you’ve considered this, Captain Obvious, but you aren't exactly having your best moment either.”

Tsukishima rolled his eyes and sat down next to Yamaguchi. “So, we’ve covered the ‘looking like shit’ part, but by any chance are ‘you feeling like shit’ as well?” Any other day, Yamaguchi would’ve been ecstatic by what seemed to be Tsukishima’s very Tsukishima way of asking what’s wrong. However, today was not any other day.

“Not really, just tired, I guess. Happy late birthday by the way.” Yamaguchi says, handing Tsukishima the bag of cookies.

“No.”

“Whaddya mean ‘no’? I’ll have you know that those cookies were homemade. Take them” Yamaguchi said, glaring.

“Fine, fine. So… Do you do any after school activities?” Tsukshima was being oddly nice and it was unsettling.

“Wha-? Oh. The prompt. Well apparently as of this morning I'm in the art club, so there’s that.” Yamaguchi shrugged. There was a lot of shrugging today.

“Oh, so we’ll be working together then.”

“Huh?”

“For the musical,” Tsukishima explained. “The art club does the sets and props, and I do the lighting so I’ll be working with you.”

“You’re into theater?”

Tsukishima shrugged. “Yeah, I guess.”

“Okay, another time, when my brain is actually functioning, tell me more about that. Anyway, what about you?” Yamaguchi said. He hoped that his brain remembered this when he actually had the energy to remember things.

Tsukishima just sat there like he was contemplating the meaning of life.

“What are you, some secret agent or something?” Yamaguchi joked.

“I work for Takeda.” Tsukishima said, the tips of his ears turning red. 

“And Takeda is….” Yamaguchi gestured with a sly smile. Whatever Takeda was, Tsukishima was embarrassed about it, and whatever could make Tsukishima of all people embarrassed deserved to be known. 

Tsukishima mumbled something incoherent.

“Ah, sorry, what was that? I didn't seem to catch it.” At this point Yamaguchi was just teasing him. How embarrassing could a job be?

Tsukishima’s eye twitched. “I work for a fucking modeling agency. I’m a model.” 

Yamaguchi’s sly smile was very quickly replaced with an extremely fake smile and raised eyebrows. “I’m sorry what?”

“Modeling. As in fashion, photography, other shit?”

To say Yamaguchi was speechless was an understatement. His brain stopped functioning, his mind somehow was completely blank and filled to the brim at the same time while he was trying to process this information. His thoughts were moving at the pace of a failed 2016 no borax slime slowly dripping into the trash while they were also moving at the pace of Trump sprinting to twitter every time he feels like lying to the public. His mind was the embodiment of a keyboard smash. His brain was stolen by scientists to create a franken-Yamaguchi to replace the real one, which actually, Yamaguchi was fine with, maybe franken-Yamaguchi could actually have a hold on the situation.

Was Tsukishima qualified for the job? Yes. Definitely. 100%. Tsukishima, the angel on earth, as a model, Yamaguchi could definitely picture. What freaked Yamaguchi out was that Yamaguchi was  _ right _ . Tsukishima Kei.  _ His Tsukishima Kei.  _ Yamaguchi’s friend Tsukishima Kei was an actual model. What the fuck. What the actual fuck.

  
  


***

  
  


The whole ‘model’ thing was a nice wake-up call for Yamaguchi. Now he was almost functioning normally, and he was able to open his eyes without immediately closing them again. He was zoning out a lot, and was only half paying attention to whatever Noya and Tanaka were saying. He pushed around his salad with his fork, the train of thought was currently off the rails and he still had his headache somehow, so he would kill a man for some peace and quiet. 

“Someone’s quiet.” Noya said, poking Yamaguchi in the arm.

“Huh? What? I’m sorry can you repeat that?” Yamaguchi says, dazed. Noya and Tanaka snickered.

“I-Is something up? You’ve been quiet and you look really tired. Is this about friday?” Yachi said, genuine concern in her voice.

“No. I mean, yeah, kinda, but not fully er- really? I’ve just got a lot going on, and I’m very tired.”

“Hold the flippity floppity fuckin phone here, what happened Friday?” Noya asked.

“What, did your angel of a boyfriend Tsukishima confess to you or something on the sleepover that you definitely most absolutely actually for sure had?” Tanaka said, smirking.

“Okay, first of all, he is not my boyfriend. No he did not confess, and I actually did go to his house, so fuck off.” 

Noya and Tanaka’s jaws dropped.

“What the FUCK? AND YOU DIDN'T TELL US?”

Yamaguchi would kill a man for some aspirin right now.

“Yeah, we did. Sleepover blah blah blah.” Yamaguchi said, waving his hand in dismissal. “And on top of all that absolute unreal bullshit, apparently the rumor is true that he’s a model or whatever.” 

Yachi’s eyebrow raised in surprise. Noya’s eyes widened, and he groaned. Tanaka laughed and held out his hand. “HAHAHA TEN BUCKS FUCKER! PAY UP!” Noya grumbled and handed over the money, flipping both Yamaguchi and Tanaka off when Tanaka pocketed it.

Yachi scolded them for betting one someone’s personal life, but Yamaguchi was more surprised that this was how they took the news. Well, they were Noya and Tanaka after all.

“So,” Tanaka started, his laughter dying down. “Did anything, you know, happen at this sleepover?” The way Tanaka was wiggling his eyebrows suggestively really pissed Yamaguchi off, so he did the right thing and punched him in the ribs under the table.

“That’s disgusting Tanaka, don’t even think of that shit. All we did was watch movies, make pancakes, and then I met his brother, and I didn't even know he  _ had _ a brother, to be honest. And then this morning I found out the model thing, and so I’m convinced that the past three days had to be a dream. Soon I'm gonna wake up and go to school on Friday.” Yamaguchi said, still glaring at Tanaka.

Noya wrapped his arm around Yamaguchi’s shoulder. “Yamaguchi, Yamaguchi, Yamaguchi. Right now, you have a better chance than any of us to get your man, and Yachi’s literally perfect. You guys literally had a sleepover for fucks sake, why the hell would he invite you if he didn't like you?”

Yamaguchi pursed his lips. “I don't know? I don’t understand any of this. Why would he invite me over, we’ve literally known each other for like two weeks, It doesn't make sense! And three people have said that it’s because he likes me, but that’s total bullshit.” Yamaguchi let out a nervous laugh. “Nothing makes sense!” As he said that, his hand flew up, hitting Noya in the face harder than Yamaguchi would like to admit. Yamaguchi let out a hesitant ‘Sorry’ but Noya waved him off. 

“Look man,” Noya said, rubbing his hand against his face to see if he had a nosebleed. (he didn't) “There are some things in life that we just don’t know the answers to. Like, why is Kiyoko into girls when wonderful, handsome, courteous men like me and my bro here exist?” Tanaka nodded in agreement. “Why do Kuroo and Oikawa pull all the girls when Tanaka and I don’t? Why can’t I get better than a D on a test? Why does Tanaka’s sister like Tanaka more than me? These questions may never be answered, but we can live with it.” Yamaguchi was pretty sure he could answer all of those questions, but he decided to give Noya points for effort. Noya patted him on the back, then gave Tanaka a high-five in achievement. 

Yamaguchi sighed. Why were these his friends again? Oh, right. Because he couldn't get a goddamn boyfriend. 

  
  


***

Yamaguchi sighed, and dug in his (very messy) locker for his notebook. He still hasn't figured out the whole ‘Tsukishima’ thing, and every day that passed was a reminder of that. It had been two weeks since, as Noya and Tanaka call it, the ‘sad-that-it-wasn't-sexy-sleepover’. At this point it felt like every two weeks something odd happened between him and Tsukishima. Now he just needed to wait for whatever happened that fucked up his heart once again. Now where the fuck was his notebook? 

Just as he was about to give up, his locker violently slammed shut dangerously close to his face. Yamaguchi turned, expecting Noya or Tanaka, but instead finding a girl he didn't recognize. She was short, just a couple inches taller than Yachi, and had short brown hair. She also happened to look pissed. “I’m sorry. Maybe you have the wrong person? I don’t think I know you…” Yamaguchi said, unsure what to say.

The girl huffed. “I know I have the right person, trust me.”

Yamaguchi was confused. “Um, okay? I don’t really know you though, I don’t think we have any classes together or anything. So…” what was a good way to say ‘you look pissed at me please go away stranger? “What did you want to talk about er- say?”

She rolled her eyes. “Don’t act like you don’t know.”

Yamaguchi looked around, this had to be a joke. “I don’t know.”

Her eye twitched, and she looked like she was about to punch him in the face. “About you and Kei you idiot.”

“Kei? As in Tsukishima?”

“Yeah Kei as in Tsukishima!” She half-yelled. “Ah fuck sorry. Anyway, stay away from him.”

“I’m sorry but I can’t really do that because we’re partners in Homeroom-” Yamaguchi started.

“No, not like that. It’s obvious you like him, but he’s mine.” Yamaguchi was surprised. Tsukishima had a girlfriend? Also, was it really that obvious?

“I think you’re misunderstanding. We’re just friends, I didn't even know he had a girlfriend.”

She laughed. “Oh no, he’s not my boyfriend.” She paused,“Yet. He’s just in denial that we’re obviously the perfect couple. So please, keep you and your gay ass out of our bissness.” She said with a fake smile.

Yamaguchi was just about to rant about the homophobic aura that gives off when someone spoke behind him. “Yamaguchi, normally you’re in class b- oh. Bitchymiya.” Tsukishima said, somehow looking pissed, annoyed, and super hot at the same time. 

“Kei!” Bitchymiya(?) said, her face exploding into a grin and hugging Tsukishima. 

Tsukishima looked  _ really _ pissed now. “Get the fuck off me.” He said, pushing her off. And walking towards Homeroom, with Yamaguchi in tow. Somehow, that didn't bother her though, and she followed alongside him. 

“You know Kei, you really ought to stop having such close relationships with your friends. Some people might get suspicious!” She said with a laugh. Tsukishima sped up, now practically dragging Yamaguchi behind him. “I mean, one of my friends in your Homeroom saw you exchanging numbers with him! Oh yes, I forgot. Last time I gave you my number you never texted me, did you lose it? Here, let me write it down for a sec.” She said, multitasking by fumbling with a post-it note and a pencil while still walking beside to them. Suddenly, Tsukishima took a turn that definitely did not lead them toward homeroom. Yamaguchi wanted to say something, but then became all-too aware that Tsukishima was holding his hand.  _ Tsukishima  _ was holding _ his _ hand. Holy shit.

They walked to some part of the far locker bay, and Tsukishima seemed to be looking for someone. And then Tsukishima caught the eye of one of his friends, the uh- what was his name again? Oi-Something? The guy with the bubbly personality and the brown hair. That one. Anyway, Tsukishima caught his eye and looked at Bitchymiya, some sort of silent signal. Oi-Whatever-his-name-was looked between Tsukishima and Yamaguchi, then looked down at their connected hands, and raised an eyebrow. Tsukishima rolled his eyes and subtly jabbed his head at Bitchymiya. 

Oikawa shook it off and put on a fake smile, abandoning the spikey-haired guy he was with. He walked toward them with confidence. “Bitchymiya! What a pleasure!” He said, grabbing her and hugging her tight. He signaled with his eyes for Tsukishima and Yamaguchi to go, and they did. As they were walking away, Yamaguchi heard something about singing in the rain and Lina Lamont, whatever that was about.

Right after the bell rang for the first hour, Tsukishima pulled them into a room that Yamaguchi didn't recognize with the lights off. Tsukishima walked over to the light switch and turned it on, revealing the music room. Yamaguchi wasn't in choir, he took art as his elective, but he remembered it from the tour for new students in the summer. Tsukishima sat in a chair and crossed his legs. “Well we’re stuck here for awhile unless you want detention.” Tsukishima said.

Yamaguchi shrugged and sat down on the floor cross-legged. “Shame there’s nothing to do here though.” he said, looking around the room. “So… What’s with you and the Bitchymiya girl?” 

Tsukishima rolled her eyes. “She’s been a pain in the ass since elementary school, she was always gushing about how we were ‘made for each other’ or whatever. Bitchymiya’s just a nickname though, her name’s Michimiya.” Well that crossed the girlfriend thing off the table.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, until Tsukishima stood up then sat down at the piano. 

“You play?” Yamaguchi asked.

Tsukishima shrugged. “I took lessons when I was younger and still play when I'm bored. Have any requests? Something well-known please.” Tsukishima said, laying his fingers on the keys. What was this guy, really. So far: An angel, a dinosaur enthusiast, a model, a children's movie lover, and now a pianist. Was there anything he couldn't do?

“You know Clair De Lune?” Yamaguchi asked.

Tsukishima nodded and started to play. The familiar tune filled the room, having an almost majestic feel with the notes bouncing off the walls. The beautiful way Tsukishima played was amazing, he had emotion and grace and perfection. Tsukishima smiled softly through his concentration and it felt like his heart was going to fly out of his chest.

  
  


Yamaguchi remembered reading that what Clair De Lune surrounded like was what falling in love felt like. 

If Tsukishima playing was what falling in love felt like, Yamaguchi wanted to keep falling forever. 

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahahahaha  
> comments are WANTED AND NEEDED  
> [mereibitch](https://mereibitch.tumblr.com/)  
> my tumblr^  
> stay safe bitches :)


	5. Sir Yamaguchi and Sir Tsukishima

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Homework, ice cream, red blazers, love advice from a guy that really should be the one getting the love advice, red blazers, and headstones.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE READ THIS!!!!!!!!!! (ESPECIALLY IF YOUR NAME IS OIKAWA_SIMP_4LIFE)  
> look. before anyone asks, no this fic has not been abandoned, nor has it been discontinued.  
> and as much as i love you all, i need to say this, and please take it kindly, i man this in a nice way. (sort of):   
> PLEASE STOP FUCKING ASKING WHEN THE NEXT CHAPTER IS COMING OUT  
> (or anything of that sort, like "iVe bEeN wAiTiNg, iTs bEeN a wEeK" or some shit)  
> LOOK, ily all, and i very much appreciate that you're taking the time to read this pile of hot garbage that i've created, BUT I WAS REALLY FUCKING BUSY OKAY  
> in the past month and a half, i've been grounded for a month, diagnosed with insomnia and put on a very strict sleep schedule with screen timers and pills and everything, had to do a two month long project abt a homophobic bitch in a week bc i procrastinate, struggled with school in general bc the semesters almost over, and more.  
> and on top of all that, i'm really, really, trying my best to write and update here, and i give my scincerest apoligies to every one of you.  
> i will try my best to get back onto a regular posting schedule, so please forgive me if its still a little odd.  
> and geez this is getting long, so on a last not i'd like to thank my beta reader for butting up with my shit, even if you are psychotic and don't like fries with ice cream :)

Yamaguchi looked down at his math homework that he’d been putting off for the last hour. Why the hell did they need to learn trigonometry anyway? It’s not like he was planning on being an engineer or anything. Yamaguchi sighed and collapsed back in his chair, then felt pings going off in his pocket. It was probably Noya and Tanaka spamming the chat again, but maybe he could convince Yachi to give him the answers to the homework. Not Noya and Tanaka. They were idiots.

To his surprise however, Yamaguchi opened his notifications to see ten messages from Tsukishima.

**Tsukishima/BFF <3**

  
  


Yamaguchi

Yamaguchi

Yamaguchi

Hey

Hey

Hey

Hey

Sorry to spam but hey

Yamaguchi

Yamaguchi

Yamaguchi

  
  


_ I need to finish this hw _

_ You better be dying _

I am dying.

Of boredom.

_ Doesn't count _

_ Besides _

_ Ive got math hw to do _

_ That def beats whatever you’re dying from _

  
  


Okay okay

True

Math is boring

But

Sitting for a half an hour with nothing to do

And still having another hour you have to wait

Is also pretty boring

_ Jesus _

_ Dont you have anything you can do? _

Nope

_ Doubt it _

Im at work and im not actually working for another hour

_ Well thats your fault _

_ You got there early _

Nuh uh

My boss got the times wrong

_ Okay so maybe its not ur fault _

_ But cmon _

_ You can find SOMETHING to do _

_ Dont you have coworkers your age or something??? _

….maybe

_ Then socialize with them _

_ Not the guy trying to do his hw _

No way in hell

_ Stop introverting _

_ They cant be that bad _

They are that bad

_ No way _

_ Tell me abt them _

_ Ive met PLENTY of annoying ppl _

Ones a tall annoying idiot who somehow has it drilled into his brain that we’re best friends

_ Okay 4 u that sounds pretty bad _

_ Are there more? _

That i interact with theres one more

He’s tolerable

30% of the time

_ Well 30% tolerable is more than 0 _

_ Make some friends mr loner _

_ Search deep, deep, DEEP down 4 ur social skills _

Damn

Sorry, i searched.

I couldnt find any.

_ Well then _

_ Let me, _

_ Sir yamaguchi, _

_ Master of words and conversation, _

_ Help you gain some s o c i a l s k i l l s _

You wernt master of words when i beat you 327-89 in scrabble

_ UIYJTDFXCGH _

_ HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW YOU WERE A SCRABBLE GOD _

_ MR 'I READ THE SCRABBLE DICTIONARY IN MT FREE TIME' _

_ HOW IS AE EVEN A WORD _

Ah yes

Sir yamaguchi, master of conversation

And sir tsukishima, god of scrabble

_ This is no time for sarcasm _

_ S o c i a l i z e _

N o

Y o u ‘ r e n o t m y m o m

_ Cfghbj _

_ Just talk to the tolerable 30% guy or whatever _

_ Pleasseeeeeeeeee _

_ That or give me the hw answers _

_ You have two options _

istg

Do you have psychic powers or something

_ *GASP* _

_ WHO TOLD YOU _

The second you talk the abt tolerable(ish) guy he starts walking toward me

_ THE PERFECT CHANCE TO SOCIALIZE :DDD _

Im walking away lmao

_ The quote goes “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” _

_ Well thats the exception _

_ those words really did hurt me _

_ And here i was thinking im the biggest introvert in the school but nooooo _

  
  


Hey i have friends

You and kenma

_ What so do kuroo bokuto and oikawa just not exist  _

I said friends

Not pains in my ass

_ You know what _

_ Idk if i should be happy that im a friend or disappointed in you _

both

Iujgfd

Tygyuus

Swvy dwiuhjsz

Dwhbs

_ Uhhh _

_ Tsukishima? _

_ You okay there ? _

Kjkhg

Yghb

YES

HAHAHAHA

FUCK YEAH

_ No you are definetly not okay _

Oh this isnt tsukki :)

_ Well then mr mystery _

_ Who do i have the pleasure of speaking to? _

Oh i like you already

Im suga

One of tsukkis coworkers

_ The tolerable or intolerable one??? _

???

_ Oh uh yeah _

_ Backread _

Oh im the 30% tolerable one lol

Honestly i thought that # would be lower lmao

I annoy the shit out of him

I am older than him tho soooo

_ So please tell me, _

_ Suga, _

_ Why did you steal his phone? _

Well you see officer,

I was curious.

_ *writes that down* _

_ Curious you say Mr. Suga? _

_ Please elaborate. _

*Sighs dramatically*

Well as you may know officer,

Tsukishima has no traces of a good personality right?

_ *nods* _

_ Yes yes go on _

And rarely genuinely smiles is that not correct?

_ *nods harder* _

_ Yes yes continue _

So you see officer, i was simply curious about what could have made the great Tsukishima Kei smile down at his phone genuinely.

_ *scribbles that all down* _

_ Ah yes, makes sense _

And i do so approve of his choice in friends :)

SPEAKING OF FRIENDS

I WOULD LOVE TO SEE YOU TEACH HIM SOME SOCIAL SKILLS

_ Alas, we have the same goal _

SO YOU SHOULD COME HERE

_ Wtf _

I OFFICIALLY DECLARE THAT ITS NOW TAKE YOUR FRIEND TO WORK DAY

_ Idk whats weirder _

_ What u just said or the fact that tsukishimas phone is typing in caps lock _

Neither

Im the weirdest :)

Okay heres the location

_ Tsukishima/BFF <3 sent his location  _

OH SHIT

_ Uh  _

_ U ok? _

UYFFCGHU

IUGYH

IIUGYTFV

Cfgbh

Vb

Okay i’m back

This is Tsukishima btw

Suga was hiding in the closet

  
  


_ Wow _

Ikr

Im not THAT scary

_ I could say otherwise _

Shut up 

_ Geez sorry _

Oh wait

He actually had a decent idea

You should come here

_ HOMEWORK _

Ill give you the answers tomorrow morning

_ … _

And ill buy you french fries

_ Add in an ice cream and you’ve got yourself a deal  _

Deal.

See you here

  
  
  
  


Yamaguchi looked down at his homework which no longer had to do (thank god). He shoved the cursed piece of paper into his backpack, and rushed downstairs to the kitchen where his mom was reading a book. 

“I’m gonna visit a friend, be back by 5:30!” He told her, sliding on his socks to the counter where he grabbed his keys.

She smirked and raised an eyebrow. “Is it  _ that  _ friend?” 

Yamaguchi was starting to regret telling her about him.

“Yes. Now bye!” Yamaguchi ran out before she could say anything scandalous like ‘Is it a date?’

  
  


***

  
  


If you asked Yamaguchi where he thought a model would work, he would probably answer something along the lines of a hollywood style warehouse with sets and things. He would most definitely not answer a giant skyscraper in the heart of the city with about a bajillion floors, which ended up being the location he was meeting Tsukishima at.

He was a little overwhelmed by all the people coming in and out, and inside he could see a packed lobby. He checked that this was the place, and it unfortunately was.

He walked in and looked around, and it was surprisingly hard to find a 6’3” tall beautiful blonde guy among about forty moving people, all of which looked (ALMOST) as tall and beautiful as Tsukishima. 

He finally found him waiting by a wide window, and his heart skipped a beat- hell, his heart skipped a whole mesure- when Tsukishima looked at him and smiled. 

“Well Sir Tsukishima? What shall we be doing?” Yamaguchi offered.

“Uh, I hadn't really thought about that. Is a tour okay?”

“Fine with me.” 

Tsukishima led him through the crowd of people, unfazed by how many beautiful people were all around them.

“....So Is this whole place a modeling place or…” Yamaguchi narrowly avoided bumping into a guy that looked like he could and would separate Yamaguchi’s head from his neck.

Tsukishima shook his head. “Takeda is actually a magazine, the modeling part is more of a subsection owned by the company.”

“huh.”

The tour continued, and Tsukishima showed him all the meeting rooms, meeting rooms, meeting rooms, and then a couple more meeting rooms, more meeting rooms, a water fountain, some more meeting rooms, and about a dozen more meeting rooms. 

“Is there anything else here besides meeting rooms?” Yamaguchi asked, now almost bored enough to go back to his homework.

Tsukishima hummed. “Well, not really, but we're getting to the area I work, so I guess we can skip all the boring shit.”

And they did.

When they arrived at the area where Tsukishima said he worked, Yamaguchi was a million times more overwhelmed then he was in the lobby. There were beautiful people  _ everywhere.  _ Were they all models? Don’t they need photographers and makeup artists and other things too? Was it legal to have so many perfect people in one place? From what Yamaguchi had seen, the logical answers were: yes, no, and unfortunately, in that order. Yamaguchi felt like he was in one of those cliche anime scenes where the guy walks into a place with a bunch of pretty people, gets a nosebleed, and passes out. Yamaguchi didn't have a nosebleed, he checked, but it did feel like he was going to pass out. He was a rock in a room full of diamonds. 

Yamaguchi shook it off and pushed his insecurities to the deep, dark corners of his mind, pleading with them not to come back. 

He followed Tsukishima to who knows where, when Tsukishima suddenly halted in his tracks. “What. What is it?” Yamaguchi asked, confused.

Tsukishima’s face had contorted with disgust, and Yamaguchi looked to where Tsukishima was looking. Maybe it was a dead rat or something?

It was not in fact, a dead rat. 

It was a tall guy, taller than Tsukishima, with silver colored hair, and cat-like green eyes. He was looking around him cluelessly, and looked like a total idiot. The guy shrugged, and started yelling, but quietly, if that was possible, like he was calling for someone. “Tsukkiiii. Tsukki. Tsukki? Tsukki I know you’re here somewhere! Damn. Uh, well, Suga said you’d be here and Suga doesn't lie, or at least I think he doesn't….” the guy kept on calling ‘tsukki’s’ name, and Yamaguchi was starting to suspect who ‘Tsukki’ was. 

Yamaguchi turned to Tsukishima, whose face had settled from absolutely disgusted to annoyed and pissed. 

“C’mon, we're going” Tsukishima, for the second time in about two weeks, took him by the hand and started dragging him in the direction they came from. 

Well this time, Yamaguhci wanted answers. He planted his feet and pulled Tsukishima back, and made them both stop abruptly. “Hold on a second there Mr. Introvert. ‘Tsukki’ is you, right?”

Tsukishima frowned. “Unfortunately, yes.” 

“Okay, besides the fact that I am totally calling you that now, that guy’s looking for you. Don’t you think you should at least go up to him or something?”

Tsukishima rolled his eyes. “Okay, I thought about it, and i’ve come to the conclusion that I don’t want to talk to him.”

“I will yell,” Yamaguchi threatened.

“You wouldn't dare.” Tsukishima glared at Yamaguchi, and if looks could kill Tsukishima would be serving jail time for life.

“I would.”

“You wouldn't.”

“I would.”

“You wouldn't.”

Yamaguchi took a big breath of air, making a show out of it to show that yes, he would dare.

“No, stop,” Tsukishima clicked his tongue. “Fine. But two sentences  _ max _ . Then we walk away.”

Yamaguchi internally celebrated his small victory. “Good enough for me. Who is this guy anyway?”

“The ‘thinks he’s my best friend’ guy.” Definitely not Tsukishima’s -excuse him-  _ Tsukki’s _ favorite person. 

“Oh come on, he can’t be  _ that  _ bad.” Yamaguchi teased.

“Picture the idiocy of your bald frind and short friend combined, then triple that.” Tsukishima deadpanned.

“...That’s pretty bad.”

“I know.”

Turns out, while they were discussing about how much of an idiot he is, the idiot in question found them first.

“Tsukki!” The idiot ran up and tackled Tsukki into a hug, and Tsukki shot him a pissed look that said ‘strangle either me or him, I don’t care, just put an end to this’, and Yamaguchi had to purse his lips to stop from laughing his ass off. 

“Get off me Lev.” Tsukki said, shoving the idiot off.

“Geez Tsukki no need to be so rude,” Lev pouted. “You should really learn how to be nicer.”

“I know right?” Yamaguchi said, still trying not to laugh.

Lev looked between Yamaguchi and Tsukki, and Yamaguchi could see the dots struggling to connect inside his head. “I’m sorry, do I know you?”

Yamaguchi gave up his failed attempts and laughed. “Oh, no, sorry. You don’t. I’m Yamagchi.”

“Oh, well then, nice to meet you Yamaguchi. Are you new here? What do you work as?” Yamaguchi was taken back, flattered that someone could mistake him for any of the beautiful people here. If he applied to this place it would be like Janice trying to join the plastics.

“You flatter me. No, I work at a movie theater close to where I live.” Yamaguchi gave a nervous laugh.

If Lev looked confused before, now it was more of a ‘whatthefuckisgoingon’ kind of thing. “Well…..why are you here then?” 

Tsukishima interrupted, and Yamaguchi was mildly worried when he saw the sadistic grin on Tsukishima’s face. “Lev! Actually, I changed my mind. I am so glad you came! You see, I was going to introduce Yamaguchi here to Yaku, but I don’t really know Yaku that well, could you introduce him for me? And it works out perfectly because he was looking for you earlier!” With that last sentence, Lev looked like he saw a ghost.

Lev sprinted away.

“That guy wasn't actually looking for him, was he.”

“Nope.”

“Ah.”

“On with the tour?”

“Don't try to brush that stunt off, asshole.” Yamaguchi stuck his tongue out at Tsukki playfully.

“Well I was just trying to….Uh…..”

“Be antisocial?”

Tsukki snapped his fingers. “Yes. That’s it.”

Yamaguchi pushed Tsukishima’s shoulder and smiled. “Fiiiiiiiine, continue on.”

Tsukki led them forward, nodding politely at people that he knew (or at least Yamaguchi assumed he knew them. Tsukishima didn't seem like the type to socialize when he wasn't forced to.)

The blonde led them past yet MORE meeting rooms, but eventually hesitated in front of a set of double doors. “Uh, I don’t know if they’re shooting in here, so be quiet I guess.” 

Tsukki and Yamaguchi walked into the room, if you could call it a room. It kind of looked like a movie set of some kind, with all the lights and the cameras and the commotion, but instead of an intricate set, there was a plain white backdrop where all the cameras were pointing. “Huh.” Yamaguchi said, impressed. This was more similar to what he pictured a modeling studio (or whatever it was called) to look like, and it was pretty cool. 

“Tsukishima! Tsukishima!” Yamaguhci whipped his head around to where the voice was coming from, and almost thought that Lev had found them again. But the guy that was getting Tsukki’s attention was definitely not Lev. This guy had the same silver-grey hair, but had softer, less angular facial features, and was a lot shorter.He also didn’t appear to be as stupid as Lev, his eyes gave off a more ‘im analyzing every aspect about you and there’s nothing you can do about it’ vibe. Sort of like Tsukki. Also like Tsukishima, he was quite attractive.

“Suga.” Tsukishima gave a polite nod, and Yamaguchi was a bit taken back by his formality.

“Aw, Tsukki, no need, “ Suga, who if Yamaguchi remembered correctly was the guy he was texting, waved him off in fake flattery. “ By the way, have you looked at the time? It’s 3:45.” Suga said with a smile. Tsukishima looked at his phone, and cursed under his breath.

“Okay, Yamaguchi, Suga. Suga, Yamaguchi. He’s the guy you were texting. I’ve gotta go, I’ll be right back. Or maybe not. Well, Yamaguchi, put your magical powers of social interaction or whatever into good use.” Tsukishima said, and exited to a hallway on their right.

Suga sighed. “He really is a mess,” They stepped over to the side, letting a woman with a briefcase through. “Honestly, I’m surprised he really has friends.”

Yamaguchi snorted. “Yeah, well, he thinks of most of his friends as, and i quote, ‘pains in the ass’. Apparently I don’t apply to that rule for some reason”

Suga gave Yamaguchi a sly smile. “I think you know the reason.” Yamaguchi’s eyebrows furrowed. He really didn't know the reason. He brushed it off anyway.

“Uh, so, why exactly did he run off?” Yamaguchi nodded his head toward where Tsukishima had gone to.

“Well, Lev and I are already done with our shoots and shit, and Tsukishima was an idiot who lost track of time”

“Wait, so he’s actually modeling?”

Suga hummed in agreement.

Yamaguchi was annoyed with himself. Really, what did he expect Tsukishima to be doing, paperwork? Babysitting? Making use of all those damn meeting rooms?

***

Ten minutes of relatively comfortable chatting with Suga later, Tsukishima came out of the hallway, and Yamaguchi would have said something if his heart hadn't just migrated out of his chest and flew to Canada. 

Tsukishima looked  _ amazing.  _ Even more amazing than usual, which Yamagchi didn't think was possible, but of course the universe hated him, and wanted to prove him wrong. He was straightening his tie with a look of slight frustration (adorable), and he was wearing some sort of dark red blazer over a button down shirt, and some black dress pants that matched his tie (that he had finally been able to get on right). His usual round clear frames had been replaced with black ones, but they didn't seem to be working very well, since Tsukishima was squinting around the room looking for someone. If someone looked closely, that someone would see that Tsukishima was wearing some makeup that highlighted his natural features, but he looked so good anyway he barely needed it. Yamaguchi was that ‘someone’. 

Tsukishima walked over to some middle-aged guy with black hair and glasses, and they talked about something that Yamaguchi was too far away to hear.

“So, how long have you liked Tsukishima?”

Suga’s voice brought him back to earth and slapped him in the face like a pile of rocks. 

Yamaguchi’s jaw dropped, then he groaned and ran his hands down his face.

“Was it really that obvious?”

“Pffffft. With the way you were looking at him? Besides Tsukishima, he’s an oblivious idiot, even the blind can see something that obvious.”

Yamaguchi sighed and Suga’s smirk turned into a smile. “If Tsukishima can talk to you for more than three seconds without saying something snarky, you definitely have a chance.”

Yamaguchi looked at Suga skeptically and frowned. “He talks to you.”

Suga shrugged. “Eh, I’m his coworker and I’m two years older than him. There’s a difference.”  _ not really,  _ Yamaguchi thought.

He heard a ‘Okay everyone ready? Checking!’ from the front of the room and looked in the direction of the set.

Tsukishima was sitting on a stool casually, until the photographer did a hand motion and he switched to a straighter, more professional-looking, posture, his eyes gazing directly at the fancy camera. The photographer took a couple pictures, did the same hand motion, and Tsukishima switched to something more casual and lighthearted, now smiling and looking of to the side.

The cycle repeated, and every time the photographer did the little flair of his hand Yamaguchi’s brain dug another inch down into the hole that was his soon-to-be grave. He could already see the headstone: Here lies Yamaguchi Tadashi, 20XX-20XX, died of his heart skipping a couple too many beats.

***

20 minutes and about a million hand flairs later, Tsukishima was finally done. Tsukishima walked over to where Yamaguchi and Suga were standing. Or rather, where Suga was standing and where Yamaguchi was gaping. 

“Yeah...sorry about that. I lost track of time.” Tsukishima said, his expression back to its usual ‘fuck off’ look. 

Yamaguchi stammered. How do you say ‘Oh my god no worries you were absolutely amazing aaaaa I’m so gay *keyboard smash* you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen but you’re straight so I'm just digging a grave for myself please at least stay friends with me god you’re gorgeous.’ without actually saying ‘Oh my god no worries you were absolutely amazing aaaaa im so gay *keyboard smash* you’re the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen but you’re straight so i'm just digging a grave for myself please at least stay friends with me god you’re gorgeous.’?

Thankfully, Suga saves the day. “Wow Tsukishima you were almost better than me!” Suga laughed.

“Oh, um…” Yamaguchi hesitated, and it was probably very awkward on Tsukishima’s end. “I don’t mind at all. And I don’t really know how any of this works but I’m sure you did great?” Yamaguchi didn't intentionally make that sound like a question, but it ended up being one. 

“Thank you.” Tsukishima said politely, and Yamaguchi wasn't sure if he was talking to Suga or him. “Well, I have to go change, but i’ll be back in five minutes.” Tsukki gave them an awkward wave, and went back to the hallway.

“You know Suga, you really saved my ass.”

“I know.”

“Wow. Real modest.”

Suga gasped extravagantly. “You wound me! I’ll have you know I know a gay panic when I see one. I’m an expert.”

Yamaguchi raised his eyebrow. “Really? Please teach me your ways, O wise one.”

“You know I bet you were nice before Tsukishima rubbed off on you. Anyway, see that guy over there?” Suga gestured to a guy with brown hair and wide shoulders that was currently taking apart one of the light fixture things. “His name’s Daichi. He isn't my boyfriend….yet.”

“Yet?”

“Yet. He likes me, and I like him, and I’ve flirted with him every day for the past four months, and yet he’s so oblivious that I could propose and he would brush it off as a joke.” Suga sighed.

“How do you know he likes you?” Yamaguchi asked.

“A mutual friend let it slip. And Asahi cannot lie for shit.”

Yamaguchi frowned at Suga’s reasoning. Why didn't he just ask the guy out himself?

“Okay look, that’s not the point. The point is, just shoot your shot with Tsukishima. The guy is way too oblivious to make a move on his own, and he obviously likes you.”

Yamaguchi opened his mouth to respond, but Suga shut him up with an ‘I’m not done’ gesture.

“Think of it this way. Tsukishima’s never mentioned a girlfriend or any interest in a girl whatsoever. Sure, he’s not really the type to overshare, but I still keep in touch with a friend of his that I met at theater camp, Oikawa, he’s the most observant person I know and he hasn’t mentioned anything about a girl of Tsukishima’s. So stop pining around and tell him you like him already!” Suga proclaimed confidently.

Yamaguchi weighed the pros and cons of confessing. 

  
  


Pros- He confessed. There’s a chance he (Tsukishima) might say yes. He’ll get five bucks from Noya and Tanaka for confessing, even if he rejects you.

Cons- He’ll probably reject Yamaguchi, stop being friends with him, and every morning in homeroom will be awkward as hell.

  
  


Yamaguchi didn't even need to think about the pros and cons of not confessing, because he already decided he wouldn't. Tsukishima was more than just some cute guy he liked. He was funny, witty, sarcastic, and overall fun to be around. He didn't want to ruin that. Yachi, Noya, and Tanaka were all great, but he had a lot in common with Tsukishima. He didn't want to ruin any friendships, especially at a new school he just started at two months ago. It was just some crush, and he’ll get over it eventually. They’re in high school for god’s sake, it’s not like he plans on following Tsukishima to college.

“Yamaguchi? If you want your promised fries and ice cream, we’re going now.” Tsukishima stepped in and shoved his train of thought off the rails.

“Oh, yeah, sorry.” 

Tsukishima rolled his eyes. “No need to be apologetic. C’mon, lets go.” Yamaguchi stood up and mentally shook himself off, giving a little goodbye wave to Suga, who waved back. No time to be depressing now, he’s got fries to look forward to.

***

“Okaaaaay. One fries and small ice cream cone for you, one strawberry milkshake for me.” Tsukishima says, sitting down at the McDonalds booth that was surprisingly clean for a public drive-thru restaurant in the middle of the city. The blonde took a long sip of his milkshake before stopping to frown at Yamaguchi.

“What the hell are you doing.” Tsukishima said.

Yamaguchi looked up from where he was currently dipping a fry into his ice cream. “Eating?”

“No, that’s not what I meant. Why are you dipping fries in ice cream.” 

Yamaguchi smiled. “My favorite food is soggy french fries, but only the soggy ones, so I was confused on what to do with the stiff ones. Then my mom taught me this genius trick about dipping them into ice cream. It’s great, trust me.” Yamagchi offered a fry to Tsukishima.

“I’ll decline, thanks.” Tsukishima said bluntly. “Anyway, you made friends with Suga fast.”

“Yeah well I’m told I have ‘magical powers of social interaction’.” Yamaguchi smirked.

“Oh shut up.” Tsukishima grumbled, but he was smiling. 

And Yamaguchi was smiling too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IF YOU HAVE NOT TRIED FRIES AND ICE CREAM GET OFF YOUR ASS AND TRY IT RN ITS SO GOOD  
> scream at me on tumblr: [mereibitch](https://mereibitch.tumblr.com/)  
> i know how yamaguchi feels here im dealing with the same 'i like this person but they're my friend and i dont want to mess it up' shit :')  
> comments are THE BEST THING EVER  
> i love you all >:)  
> Next Ch: a suprising lack of Tsukshima, but lots of his friends. also, KIYOKO :DDD

**Author's Note:**

> i fiNally posted it wOw.  
> i ty you all for reading :))) ily all  
> my tumblr is @mereibitch you can tell me abt my trash writing on there  
> COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED TO THE MAXXXXXXXX  
> (ch 2 will be out within the next hour, i like to post the first two at once :)))


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